Psychedelics have a unique ability to repair relationships through deep bonding, but they also alter realities and can intensify physical sensation. This power demands extreme caution and absolute trust. Each substance—from MDMA to mushrooms—affects sexual experiences differently, making clear intentions and safety essential before diving in.
Key Takeaways
- Substance-Specific Effects: Different substances uniquely alter sexual experiences; for example, MDMA acts as a “love drug” by boosting oxytocin and empathy, while LSD and psilocybin may lead to more visual or introspective, philosophical connections.
- A “Non-Specific Amplifier”: Psychedelics act as a catalyst that can either repair relationships through profound bonding or expose irreconcilable truths and incompatibilities that were previously ignored.
- The Necessity of Caution: Because these substances radically shift one’s perception of reality, they require a rigorous foundation of trust, and pre-established ground rules.
- Psychedelic Passage: Your Psychedelic Concierge — The easy, legal way to find trustworthy psilocybin guides, facilitators and psychedelic-assisted therapy near you in the United States
Most of western society’s psychedelic luminaries who made a name for themselves in the 20th century had a partner that they shared the exploration of their minds and bodies with.
Alexander Shulgin had Ann, Timothy Leary had Rosemary, Gordon Wasson shared his love for psychedelic history with his wife and fellow mycologist, Valentina. Even Aldous Huxley convinced his wife, Laura, to give him LSD on his death bed, resulting in immediate relaxation, and a peaceful passing.
For a long time, the “Great Man” theory of history tended to swallow up the brilliant women working right alongside these figures, often relegating them to footnotes or “supportive spouse” labels when they were actually co-architects of the work, so I’ll ask for pardon if you notice that the men were listed first, I’m just following how they were perceived by society.
The experiences of couples like the Shulgins would make anyone want to try it out, while the reality is far less predictable. So, before you text your significant other that you know what you want to do for Valentine’s Day, heed this warning: psychedelic substances, as a whole, are unpredictable, and possibly subversive to your everyday reality.
They might have the ability to make you think you can fly, as the fear mongering from the 1960s often perpetuated. Even Timothy Leary said, “One should never take LSD in an apartment on the third floor in New York. There are too many windows.” Whether he said that to appease the every-looming government or truly meant it, we may never know.
They might cause you to think you are in a dream or an alternate reality. You might even think you’re dead for a little bit. Why is this important? Because you have a responsibility to other person when sharing physical connection, especially of an intimate or romantic nature while under the influence of a reality-shifting substance. Things can get weird. We mustn’t forget to treat psychedelics with respect, especially in relation to our fellow humans.
So take it from those who have done it before you, learn from others’ mistakes. Don’t be the person who rips off your partner’s nipple because you thought you were in a BDSM daydream. Reddit shows us it can happen.
For this article, we’ll talk through the known and theorized history of psychedelics and sex, before hearing from modern psychonauts what it’s like to commune with each other, and then finally taking a peek at how modern research is utilizing this unique combination.
Caution: Psychedelics and sex are both two powerful forces that have the potential to deeply affect a person. This is not a topic to take lightly, or to trivialize. If you are going to partake in sex while under the influence of psychedelics, please, do your due diligence and make sure all parties involved give consent and ground rules are established beforehand. It goes without saying that consent is necessary to sex in general, but precautions should go over and above, especially when mixing sexual experiences with psychedelics.
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The History of Psychedelics & Sex
A study published in March of 2025, Perceived Impact of Psychedelics on Sexual, Gender, and Intimate Relationship Dynamics: A Mixed-Methods Investigation, used an online survey to look at how psychedelics affect different aspects of people’s relationships, gender and sexuality.
It reported that “a higher proportion of participants indicated that psychedelic experiences enhanced, rather than diminished, relationship quality, attraction to current partners, and sexual activities” with “52.8% reporting long-term effects.” This led us to do some research of our own.
The intimate relationship between psychedelics and sex began long before Timothy Leary told Playboy magazine that, “there is no question that LSD is the most powerful aphrodisiac ever discovered by man” in 1966.
Mind altering substances and sex have consistently been the paramount aspects in religious experiences for thousands of years, which were actually highly structured and community-driven. It was never about the sex, it was about the ritual, it was about intentionality.
Of course, reasons for this combination have ebbed and weaved with the channel of time, for as Maria Sabina put it, nobody took the “the children” (“Los Niños” as psilocybin mushrooms are affectionately called) to commune with God, they were taken to heal the sick.
In our cookie cutter western world, its uses now range from recreational, to therapeutic, and everything in between. But before we dive into that, let’s first peer into history and see what we find.
Who was the first? We may never know, unfortunately much of what we know boils down to codices created by conquerors and colonizers, but nonetheless, historians and archaeologists alike have come up with some pretty convincing evidence-based theories. Here are some examples to show how this combination has stood the test of time.
Ancient Egypt & the Blue Lotus
The Blue Lotus (Nymphaea caerulea) was no secret in ancient Egypt, in fact it was a central pillar in Egyptian elite social and spiritual life.
The “Turin Papyrus” (feel free to search the image on your own), depicts various sexual acts, with the women only wearing blue lotus blossoms, mostly on their heads, or sniffing the flowers.
Images of sniffing the flowers can be seen in many Egyptian hieroglyphs, especially in banquet scenes, which is particularly interesting given the fact that the psychoactive alkaloids found in the plant can be ingested via the mucus membrane.
The blue lotus is commonly depicted next to the Mandrake fruit, which you may have heard from Harry Potter. This fruit is a hallucinogenic deliriant, called the “love apple” in the Bible, and seeing them pair together in various depictions suggests they were used together to increase the effects.
Luckily, we have archeological evidence and chemical analysis to back the claims that these substances were used as aphrodisiacs. Many wine glasses in ancient Egypt boasted the blue lotus design shown below.
Lotiform chalice or “wine cup” | Source: Tjehenet: Egyptian Faience – Birmingham Egyptology
Blue Lotus flower from ancient Egypt | Source: The Mysterious Blue Lotus: Ancient Egypt’s Sacred Flower, Rediscovered. Science News Today
The Blue Lotus has two interesting alkaloids that could point to why it was used in a sexual context: Apomorphine and Nuciferine.
Apomorphine is a non-selective dopamine agonist, with the ability to treat erectile dysfunction. Nuciferine is a mild sedative and anti-spasmodic, helping to lower social anxiety and physical tension. Together, it makes sense why this substance would be used in fertility and abundance rituals where sexual acts were performed.
It’s important to note that the actual blue lotus flower used in ancient Egypt has been deemed endangered, mainly believed to be due to the Aswan Dam built on the southern Nile River. This is important because there are many online retailers touting “blue lotus” vape cartridges, capsules and other products, but upon further investigation, they’re mostly Nymphaea nouchali, another water lily with a bluish hue, or even Nelumbo nucifera, both similar in appearance but have extremely different chemical make ups.
Aztec Rituals & Mysterious Plants
In the Aztec world (Nahua culture), the use of Teonanácatl (Psilocybe mushrooms) or the “flesh of the gods” was deeply intertwined with the concepts of ecstasy, fertility, and social celebration.
Unlike the modern, western view of mushrooms as a “trippy” individual experience, the Aztecs saw them as a way to to connect to the gods, with sex being a vital force within the cycle of death and rebirth— a way to participate in the “bloom” of the universe.
Xochipilli is a deity of many things in Aztec religion, with fertility, music and fun being a few of them. Interestingly, this deity was revered in both masculine and feminine forms, which is actually no surprise considering the Aztec creation myth begins with Ometeotl, a deity that was both male and female, representing the union of the opposites.
Considering the foundation of their beliefs is the communing of opposing life forces, it’s no surprise that they believed that sexual energy was required to maintain the tonalli or “vital energy” of the world.
They also believed that the act of having sex kept the world vital, and without it, Earth would become barren and cold.
Below is the famous statue of Xochipilli. The deity is seemingly frozen in a pose of reverie, called the sacred trance of temicxoch or “Flowery Dream,” thought to represent the altered state of consciousness that the plants and fungi etched into it can cause. Many have theorized the actual identity of these etchings.
Gordon Wasson, the very man credited with ushering magic mushrooms into the western world after meeting with Maria Sabina, describes the emblem in the center of the pedestal when he first saw it in the 1950’s, “Many have referred to it as a flower, but what flower? From the beginning I felt the five convex devices with inturned margins arranged in a circle were mushrooms. They represent the mushrooms in profile.” (The Wondrous Mushroom, Page 59.)
Statue of Xochipilli | Source: The Wondrous Mushroom by Gordon Wasson (pg 56)
Profile of a) design on ‘base’ of Xochipilli and b) Psilocybe aztecorum | Source: The Wondrous Mushroom by Gordon Wasson (pg 61)
The most prominent theories, including that put out by Albert Hoffman, the creator of LSD, name morning glories, marigolds, and the tobacco flower, while also agreeing on mushrooms such as psilocybe aztecorum, known as teonanacatl, as other examples carved into the statue.
The ololiuqui plant (Turbina corymbosa) also has a long-standing association with Xochipilli in Mesoamerican culture. The ololiuqui plant is actually a species of morning glory, which we know has concentrations of LSA in its seeds.
LSA is a hallucinogenic compound that is structurally very similar to LSD, granted, other compounds that are present in the seeds can cause undesirable effects such as excess vomiting, nausea, or vasoconstriction.
Amazingly, Xochipilli’s female counterpart, Xochiquetzal, embodies carnal desire, and represents a different kind of love than that of perpetuating life; she represents sex for pleasure.
In a society that also had a class of women whose role was to accompany warriors and participate in public festivals, they would dance with the warriors during these festivals, designed to release sexual tension and keep the warriors brave.
Not only would Aztecs engage in sexual acts during rituals like those for fertility, but they would celebrate all of their dieties, including Xochiquetzal, the goddess of beauty and love, and we know they loved their mind-altering substances.
The Far-Reaching Practice of Sexual Psychedelic Use
These are just a few small examples of the interaction between psychoactive substances and sex throughout history.
The Aboriginal Australians used Pituri (a mixture of Duboisia hopwoodii leaves and ash), that acted as a stimulant and hallucinogen during “Increase Ceremonies” where ritualized sexual acts were meant to increase fertility and abundance in the world (The Aboriginal Tribes of Central Australia by Baldwin Spencer and F.J. Gillen).
The Bwiti spiritual tradition of Central Africa uses Iboga (active ingredient ibogaine) for a number of reasons, including to heal the sick, but for any reason that spiritual guidance is needed, a Bwiti ceremony can be held.
Anthropologist James Fernandez documented specific nocturnal ceremonies where the consumption of Iboga is followed by what is essentially a “Sacred Mass.” The drug is used to overcome the “coldness” or “distance” between men and women.
He describes ceremonies where the Nlem Mbe or “One Heart” is sought through a communal atmosphere that can lead to sexual intimacy, which is viewed as a sacrament rather than a private act of pleasure.
These ceremonies are meant to bring husband and wives together when negative feelings have driven them apart, as a way to keep the community healthy.
He describes how the “Wood” (Iboga) is a “mirror of the soul,” also noting that if a couple takes the medicine and their hearts are not “straight” (honest), the medicine will punish them with a “bad trip” or a terrifying vision.
The medicine doesn’t “pick and choose” a happy ending; it simply shows the couple the truth of their connection. If the connection is dead, the Iboga makes that “death” impossible to ignore (Bwiti: An Ethnography of the Religious Imagination in Africa by James W. Fernandez).
Tantric Sex & Cannabis
Tantric sex is something we know Timothy and Rosemary Leary explored, as one man called Rosemary a “tantric sex Goddess,” and definitely while under the influence of LSD and cannabis, two substances they took frequently.
But the story of tantric sex, a sort of sexual yoga, began in ancient India around the 5th century CE, when it branches off of the broader Tantra tradition that combines physical postures, breathwork and meditation for expanding consciousness.
To those who follow the Tantra tradition, the lines between sexuality and spirituality are blurred into once cohesive practice, and in the act of making love, the couple is communing with a higher power, and the Kama Sutra is the Sanskrit text that outlines not only sex, but love making, maintaining a healthy sexual life, the nature of love and so on.
Tantric sex’s original use would have been in a religious context, utilizing sexual fluids as powerful substances for ritual purposes, but once it reached the western world, it was rumored to hold secrets to intense orgasmic experiences and longer sessions that made many hippies of the 1960s give it a shot.
In ancient India, cannabis was one of the substances recognized as enhancing these practices, specifically in making orgasms feel better, for sex to last longer, and for an overall heightened emotional experience.
Interestingly, research over the years has shown an overall positive connection between cannabis and sexual activity, although daily cannabis use has been associated with an inability to reach orgasm, or reaching it too fast or too slow (Smith et al. 2010).
The thing about cannabis is that it can prolong reaching orgasm for everyone, not just men, and sometimes it may prolong them too long. It’s common enough where it’s definitely worth being aware of if you are thinking about trying it, but on the other hand, orgasms can be much more intense once finally achieved, so be prepared to enjoy the ride! (No pun intended.)
Palamar et al back in 2018 surveyed young nightclub attendees ages 18–25 and found that a majority of cannabis users reported an increase in sexual enjoyment and orgasm intensity, but this only showed preliminary results in a small group.
Moser et al., 2023 strengthened the argument that cannabis enhances sexual practices, with over 811 survey participants with ages ranging from 18–85 found that, “overall, results indicated that both men and women perceived that cannabis use increased their sexual functioning and satisfaction, particularly increased desire and orgasm intensity.”
So are tantric practices necessary to enhance sexual activity with cannabis? Absolutely not, cannabis has the ability to enhance sexual experiences all on its own, however there are many different ways to incorporate it.
Thinking about combining cannabis with psychedelics? Best to read our Definitive Guide to Mixing Cannabis and Psychedelics, first.
Modern Examples of Psychedelics & Sexuality
The Shulgins
The psychedelic revolution briefly picked up speed in the 1960’s, when MDMA was being synthesized for therapists and wasn’t made illegal yet, and LSD was getting out into the general population.
As it turned out, sex and psychedelics were closely linked in the 1960s. The hippies liked to have sex on psychedelics, the government liked to complain about it, and research was abundant.
This psychedelic boom was quickly reeled in with the Controlled Substances Act of 1970, blocking all research into therapeutic benefits of psychedelics, and ushering in the War on Drugs that halted the collective scientific advancement of psychedelics and locking many psychonauts in jail.
There was however one man, who was given a Schedule I research license by the DEA, which gave him the ability to create and experiment with hundreds of substances with varying levels of psychedelic effects.
That man was Alexander “Sasha” or “Shura” Shulgin. His counterpart, and possibly the reason we know so much about their private life, was the wonderful Ann Shulgin.
The Shulgins’ ability to articulate what they feel and visualize is incredible, and we’re lucky they cared so much about recording their experiences.
If you aren’t familiar with Alexander Shulgin, he was an American biochemist in the mid to late 1900s who discovered or rediscovered over 179 synthetic substances, mostly in his basement, which he tested on himself and his (more than willing) friends.
All the while, he was working for the DEA as an expert witness, hosting seminars, and even supplying them with samples of various compounds. So, he’s a controversial figure to say the least, but that’s not the point of this article.
In their book, which they co-wrote, Pihkal, published in 1991, Sasha stated “MDMA could be all things to all people” (p. 72) mentioning that one psychiatrist stated it was “Penicillin for the soul, and you don’t give up penicillin, once you’ve seen what it can do.” (p. 74)
Published in 1991, Pihkal, co-written by the Shulgins, describes their experiences as Shura was creating and testing these substances. He had his quirks regarding Ann, if you know you know, but I personally view them as a power couple and I think psychedelics strengthened their bond.
Sprinkled throughout their book are their tales of fantastical sexual experiences while under the influence of various psychoactive compounds, in which they documented extensively. The editors had to cut a lot of sex scenes out apparently.
LSD
Interestingly, LSD was something they called “the dangerous enemy” due to the “negative propaganda” spread in the 1960s, but together, they decided to try it for themselves to see what all the fuss was about.
Here’s Ann’s account of their sexual experience while on LSD for the first time:
“When I closed my eyes, the inner world erupted into detailed imagery. Shura went up the radio dial and found Chopin, and when he turned back to me, I sat up and took off my gown. I saw behind closed eyelids a lovely scene. We — Shura (another nickname for Alexander “Sasha” Shulgin) and I — were looking down from an open balcony into a central courtyard. We were in a place that appeared to consist of balconies hung with baskets of flowers, storey upon storey, surrounding the courtyard below. Ivy plants rose from the edges of the garden and crept up the walls and columns. Looking down into the piano which was being played — Chopin’s music, of course — by a young man in a tuxedo. I could see only the top of his brown hair and his moving hands.
When I heard Shura’s gasp and the start of the shaking cry, I had a moment of startled anxiety, realizing that what we were doing, he and I, must be completely visible to anyone who might be standing on a balcony above ours, and that we could very well be in serious trouble if we made too much noise. The pianist might stop, and look to see what was happening up there above him. I thought of warning Shura not to yell, as he usually did, but before I could say the words, I realized that we were perfectly safe on the big bed, and that I had been letting the line between reality and fantasy blur.”
(Ann Shulgin, Pihkal, p. 325)
A similar anecdote can be found in Acid Queen by Susannah Cahalan, which outlined the life of Rosemary Woodruff Leary, Timothy Leary’s fourth wife.
While living at the Millbrook Estate in New York, a sort of commune, friends apparently recalled Timothy Leary lying on the floor with his arms outstretched to his sides and Rosemary lying over him crying, because they were in a shared LSD hallucination, thinking they were Mary and Jesus.
Psilocybin
Psilocybin (the active compound in magic mushrooms) was a bit different. When we asked Reddit, it didn’t seem like psilocybin-containing mushrooms were a big hit for psychedelic sexual experiences, but the Shulgins of course tried it, and reported their findings.
Again, it was in Ann’s voice. They spent the first hour or so discussing the philosophy behind natural vs synthetic substances, something Sasha had debated with the famous Terence McKenna, who believed only the natural mushroom will have the “personality” attributed to it, and not psilocybin or psilocin made in a lab.
Here, they tried synthetic psilocybin, synthesized by Sasha himself, and once the substance had taken full effect, they began their sexual exploration together:
“The two of us were joining in the net of light that covered the earth, adding ourselves, our emotions and thoughts, our experiences of each other’s smells and tastes, to flavor the whole. In the slowing of time, each touch of hand and mouth was an act of beauty, an offering of our own livingness and power to affirm. We were saying Yes to ourselves, to each other, to being alive, and Yes was pulsing back at us.
How do we learn to make love? How do we know to trace brocade circles with our fingers on the beloved’s skin, to say I Want with a stroke of an ankle on thigh, to honor to beauty of curve and bone with hand and mouth. It’s a language of body, and it opens with the opening of love in the heart and mind. It can’t be explained. It teaches itself as you touch.
When Shura cried out, De Falla’s Nights in the Gardens of Spain was playing. After a while he attended to me. I saw far ahead a clear gemstone — it looked like a pale aquamarine — and, spiraling up from it, blue-white gems which gradually shaded to mauve, then to violet, as they passed on either side of my head. I felt the aura of the Grail, then a flood of exquisiteness roared towards me, and I was left floating in a sea of soft blue light.”
(Ann Shulgin, Pihkal, p. 238)
Shrooms offered a much more introspective experience for Ann Shulgin than LSD, apparent by the italicized philosophical texts that litter her description of their experience, as well as an overall reverence for nature and each other—for all things, really.
We’ll end this section on the Shulgins by saying that they were as expert as experts get in the psychedelics and sex realm. I’m sure not every experience was as graceful, but it seems like every experience did bring them closer.
They were both experienced in altered states of consciousness, and trusted each other whole-heartedly, but it stands to show the endless possibilities that can arise when mixing these powerful modalities of exploration.
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Anecdotes From Reddit
We asked redditors if their psychedelic sexual experiences have positively or negatively affected their relationships, and we had a range of powerful stories shared with us, each one exemplifying a small piece of a bigger picture.
Non-Specific Amplifier Effect
We’ve talked about the non-specific amplifier effect quite a bit, as psychedelics are known to intensify or bring to the surface emotions that are already there, but maybe not consciously observed.
“I have had psychedelics bring me closer to my partners and also indicate to me that a relationship was no longer working. The experience created a mutual feeling for both of us though and over ten years later we are still great friends!”
This commenter has experienced different substances with the same partner, and highlights slight nuances with each one.
“In my relationship with my now fiancée, she had prior experience with MDMA and had always had LSD on her bucket list. I’d always been curious but a bit frightened of either prospect, so it was rather ironic that I actually am the one who met the connection who supplied us with both.
We had done shrooms together via her hook up early on, and it was a lot of fun, but I don’t think it brought us any more or less close. And one of the last times we barely interacted because, for whatever reason, the shrooms hit me so hard that I immediately came, then threw up, then felt completely shaky and weak to the point I just had to curl up in bed teetering between orgasmic and sick. That definitely robbed any potential for connection.
MDMA isn’t quite a psychedelic (though it can be in high enough doses where the brain converts it into MDA) but I’ll count it regardless. Our first time trying it was actually when we were mildly fighting that our usual activities had become stale. The experience was magical… I’d never loved her so deeply or wanted to experience her so badly. We talked, we made love, we cuddled, then made love again. She finally felt uninhibited enough to try things she never would before and I melted from the pure joy of it. When we were at our most vulnerable and honest, she was so kind. It made me realize I’d never received kindness from a partner before, not really. The vulnerable moments scared me because those cracks were usually where disappointment lived; where past partners admitted I’m not enough, they felt trapped, or they could do better, or were settling. There was none of that with her… just love. I always loved her, but I had the crashing realization it was the first time I earnestly believed she loved me back.
I wish I could say LSD was as beautiful as all that, but it honestly just connected me with this fathomless carnal need for her body. It began as a sort of awe where I swore I could see her veins under her skin and it looked like a map of the stars. Then once she was nude it was like every childhood crush I’d ever had, every porn star I’d ever watched, every woman I’d ever daydreamed awkwardly about was standing in front of me wet and willing. It felt like I was recognizing everything sexy about her for the first time. I felt like I was having sex with a literal goddess. I don’t know if it brought us closer, per se, but since then even when I’m alone hers is the only body that really “does” it for me. I’m still mildly obsessed to the point I have to consciously monitor how much I’m paying attention to it and make certain I access that loving part that MDMA brought out just as much.”
Bonding & Working Through Problems
One redditor described how psychedelics are used as a therapeutic tool in maintaining a healthy, communicative relationship:
“My partner and I like to do psychedelics together every few weeks. It really helps us discuss difficult topics or things we’ve been avoiding in daily life. Really increases our bonding or repairs drift in our relationship.”
Risks
We briefly mentioned the risk associated with psychedelics and sex. Remember Ann Shulgin forgetting where she was? And there’s no way you forget about the nipple. It’s important to know that we didn’t just make it up. This redditor’s experience reminds us just how powerful these reality-altering substances can be:
“I did LSD once with my girlfriend of the time. We had a bdsm relationship. I don’t know how we got into a scene while tripping, but we did. Bad idea. I managed to pull off dragon clips off of her nipples. For those that don’t know dragon clips clamp harder the harder you pull on them. I could have seriously ripped her nipples off. Logic goes right out the window on LSD. It didn’t strengthen or weaken our relationship. In fact I completely forgot about being sexual on that trip until she reminded me years later.”
Physical risks aren’t the only thing to be wary of either. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy, but it’s a common human experience: realizing they aren’t the one for you. You’d think this is a good thing, right? Only for the lucky ones who are in a position to be able to leave.
What if you’re married with two kids and a baby on the way? What if your lives are so intertwined, the logistics of leaving aren’t feasible? That’s the risk you run when you take these medicines, the truth may come out, and it doesn’t discriminate.
“I can’t lie, especially not to myself when I’m in that state. So, for me, it was pretty devastating. What I mean is, I saw something that I couldn’t unsee. I felt something that I couldn’t shake even long after the effects of the drug had worn off. I realized that I had been lying to myself regarding what/who I wanted to be in relationship with. I had to accept that I had betrayed myself— my values, my deepest desires, my vision—and instead I had chosen to stay with someone that I wasn’t actually compatible with, wasn’t sexually attracted to and all the rest, all so that I might live an easier, less complicated life, and be more acceptable to family and …society (?) —it’s a little hazy.
After trying to be intimate with him while tripping (he initiated), all of this truth was kind of dropped in my lap and it was heavy, and distracting, and it didn’t budge. I couldn’t ignore it, and denial no longer worked. So, yeah, the truth was revealed to me (with the help of psychedelics), but it’s kinda been a pain because now I have to confront it… like all the time. It’s the elephant in the room. I actually have to make decisions and deal with the weight/associated guilt. It’s been heavy and i don’t recommend anything like this unless you’re in a solid place mentally, spiritually, emotionally… of course, then again, I wasn’t, I was looking to shake things up and that’s why I agreed to the trip in the first place… but I definitely got more than I bargained for! In any case, I recommend caution …a careful approach.”
The hard trips are often the most enlightening and conducive to positive change, and this commenter is right, you shouldn’t take them unless you are ready to welcome any and all truths, no matter how inconvenient.
A few commenters also warned about becoming reliant on the chemically achieved happiness that these substances can bring us, and when to recognize when you’re in a relationship for the highs, not for the person.
For example, some folks may, either subconsciously or consciously, may use a relationship as a cover for their addiction. Addicts can feed into a loop of drug use because they are with another person so “it’s okay,” but it isn’t—it’s just two addicts feeding into each other.
Recommended Reading: Navigating Power Dynamics in Psychedelic Therapy
MDMA: The Love Drug
Any substance that is powerful enough to make running water feel orgasmic, needs to be treated with reverence, and also needs to be heavily researched, in my opinion.
Luckily, recent research begins to paint the picture of this “orgasmic” physical phenomenon, explained by the chemical cascade that MDMA causes in our brain.
First, MDMA can increase plasma oxytocin levels by over 400%, oxytocin being the hormone responsible
for social bonding, as well as increase serotonin, our “happy chemical” (Kirkpatrick et al., 2014).
The set of nerves in our skin often called “the pleasure nerves” are specifically designed to respond to gentle, slow touch. A study in 2019 showed that “MDMA significantly increased the perceived pleasantness of the slow touch, but not fast touch,” which is thought to be modulated by oxytocin and serotonin, the two hormones affected by MDMA.
MDMA also dampens our amygdala’s or “fear center’s” threat response, which would typically come online to assess the threat level of physical touch, while simultaneously intensifying our reward response, causing us to be less afraid of rejection, and more receptive to connection (Bedi et al., 2009).
The newest research showing that those with the highest baseline amygdala activity (those who are naturally more “on guard” or anxious) showed the most significant reduction in amygdala activity after taking MDMA, showing therapeutic promise for those with heightened fear responses (Zhang et al., 2025).
Seeing the biochemistry, it’s no surprise that MDMA has a long standing reputation as the “love drug.” Before “molly” reached music festivals, it could be found in therapists offices across the country, even while the government’s War on Drugs raged on. Therapists saw its potential so strongly, they would risk their practice to help people with it.
Alexander Shulgin was one of the first to get his hands on it, and would call it his “low-calorie martini,” sipping on a MDMA concoction while all his friends drank alcohol. Shulgin was well-connected, to say the least. As a revered chemist, he conversed with many experts in many fields, including a friend and psychotherapist on the verge of retirement in 1977, Leo Zeff.
Zeff had been secretly using psychoactive substances like LSD, MDA and ibogaine in his practice, and over the decades had evolved his practice into something strikingly similar to modern day psychedelic-assisted therapy. By 1977, he thought he had seen it all, until Shulgin gave him a visit with a vial of MDMA to try.
Shulgin left the vial with Zeff, and told him to let him know if he ended up trying it. Sure enough, Zeff called him a few days later declaring that he’s no longer retiring, and spent the next decade traveling the country teaching therapists how to work with MDMA in a therapeutic context.
As clinical trials rolled out, it was clear Shulgin and Zeff were on to something. Since then, MDMA has proven itself to have a particular knack in promoting bonding and empathy.
Real World Application in Therapeutic Context: MDMA-Assisted CBCT
Are you worried MDMA will take away all your inhibitions and cause you to blindly trust a person who you shouldn’t? Think again, this substance is much more nuanced than that.
A landmark study in 2018 where participants were given MDMA and asked to play an online game similar to Prisoner’s Dilemma with “trustworthy” and “untrustworthy” opponents. The study found that MDMA makes people more cooperative, but not gullible.
Participants under the influence were more willing to rebuild trust after a betrayal in the game, but did not blindly trust untrustworthy opponents. This shows that MDMA can be an amazing relationship repairer without sacrificing judgement.
There are many reasons a relationship may need to be repaired, maybe life has just gotten busy and you and your partner haven’t found time for each other. Maybe one of you suffers from PTSD, as is the case for many, many Americans, most apparent in military and veteran populations.
It happens to the best of us, as relationships require upkeep, and life never seems to slow down, so don’t feel hopeless just yet, the simple act of “bonding” has a significant impact on physical health and recovery as well as mental health (Idler et al., 2012, Coen et al., 2013, Waldinger & Waldinger, 2023).
That brings us to possibly the most exciting piece of research in this article, the best piece of real-world research happening with MDMA: the MAPS study led by Dr. Anne Wagner using MDMA-assisted Cognitive Behavioral Conjoint Therapy (CBCT) for romantic couples, where one partner had PTSD.
This study has been in the making for years, and the results are pretty incredible, finding that “both partners reported improvements in post-traumatic growth, relational support, and social intimacy. Partners reported reduced behavioral accommodation and conflict in the relationship, and patients with PTSD reported improved psychosocial functioning and empathic concern. These improvements were maintained throughout the (6-month) follow-up period” (Wagner et al., 2021).
Recommended Reading: Psychedelic Guides Answer FAQS: MDMA Therapy for Couples
Conclusion: A Sacred, Yet Sharp, Double-Edged Sword
The history of psychedelics and sex is a rich tapestry woven with ancient rituals, scientific curiosity, and deeply personal revelations. From the lotus-scented banquets of Ancient Egypt to the clinical breakthroughs of MDMA-assisted therapy in 2025, it is clear that these substances do more than just “heighten” pleasure— they act as profound catalysts for connection, truth, and healing— even without sex.
However, as we have seen through both historical accounts and modern anecdotes, this combination is not a shortcut to a perfect relationship. Psychedelics are non-specific amplifiers; they can illuminate the divine beauty in a partner just as easily as they can expose the cracks in a failing foundation. Whether it is the “One Heart” sought by the Bwiti or the “flowery dreams” of the Aztecs, the common thread is intentionality.
If you choose to explore these frontiers, remember that the most important “substance” involved is the trust between you and your partner. When approached with reverence, clear communication, and unwavering consent, the union of psychedelics and intimacy can indeed be a “penicillin for the soul”—offering a rare glimpse into a world where the barriers between self and other finally dissolve.
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Frequently Asked Questions
1. Why does MDMA make physical touch feel so different compared to other substances?
Biochemically, MDMA is unique because it specifically targets the “pleasure nerves” in the skin designed to respond to slow, gentle touch. While other psychedelics might distort the visual or mental perception of a partner, MDMA increases plasma oxytocin levels by over 400%, effectively lowering the brain’s fear response (in the amygdala) and heightening the reward response. This makes connection feel physically safer and emotionally more rewarding.
2. Can psychedelics actually “save” a failing relationship?
It depends on the foundation of the relationship. Psychedelics are non-specific amplifiers, meaning they bring existing, often buried, truths to the surface. As seen in modern research and Reddit anecdotes, they can facilitate “relationship repair” by fostering empathy and cooperation. However, they can also act as a “double-edged sword” by exposing fundamental incompatibilities that a couple can no longer ignore once the trip reveals the “truth” of their connection.
3. How does the “reality shift” of LSD differ from Psilocybin in a sexual context?
According to the experiences of pioneers like Ann Shulgin, LSD often produces highly detailed, externalized imagery and a carnal, “goddess-like” appreciation for the partner’s body.
In contrast, anecdotal reports show that psilocybin (mushrooms) tends to be more introspective and philosophical, focusing on a “net of light” or a spiritual reverence for nature and life itself. Each substance creates a distinct “flavor” of reality that dictates the tone of the intimacy.
4. Is “Blue Lotus” still a viable aphrodisiac today?
While the Blue Lotus was a pillar of Egyptian spiritual and sexual life due to alkaloids like Apomorphine (which can treat erectile dysfunction) and Nuciferine (a sedative), the original species used by the Egyptians is now endangered.
Most modern products sold as “Blue Lotus” are often different species with entirely different chemical makeups, meaning they likely won’t produce the same historical effects described in ancient papyri.
5. Why is “Intentionality” more important than the substance itself?
While the chemical makeup of a substance sets the stage, intentionality acts as the director of the experience. Historically, cultures like the Bwiti or the Aztecs didn’t use these plants to “chase a high,” but to achieve a specific outcome—whether that was healing the “coldness” between a couple or participating in the “bloom” of the universe.
Without a clear intention and a foundation of trust, the drug simply amplifies whatever is present, which can lead to the “bad trips” or physical lapses in judgment mentioned in the Reddit anecdotes. Intentionality ensures that the shift in reality serves a purpose, turning a potentially chaotic event into a meaningful tool for bonding or repair.
References
- Bedi, G., Phan, K. L., Angstadt, M., & de Wit, H. (2009). Effects of MDMA on sociability and neural response to social threat and social reward. Psychopharmacology, 207(1), 73–83. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00213-009-1635-z
- Coan, J. A., Kasle, S., Jackson, A., Schaefer, H. S., & Davidson, R. J. (2013). Mutuality and the social regulation of neural threat responding. Attachment & Human Development, 15(3), 303–315. https://doi.org/10.1080/14616734.2013.782656
- de Wit, H., & Bershad, A. K. (2019). MDMA enhances pleasantness of affective touch. Neuropsychopharmacology. https://doi.org/10.1038/s41386-019-0473-x
- Gabay, A. S., Kempton, M. J., Gilleen, J., & Mehta, M. A. (2019). MDMA Increases Cooperation and Recruitment of Social Brain Areas When Playing Trustworthy Players in an Iterated Prisoner’s Dilemma. Journal of Neuroscience, 39(2), 307–320. https://doi.org/10.1523/JNEUROSCI.1276-18.2018
- Idler, E. L., Boulifard, D. A., & Contrada, R. J. (2012). Mending Broken Hearts. Journal of Health and Social Behavior, 53(1), 33–49. https://doi.org/10.1177/0022146511432342
- Kirkpatrick, M. G., Francis, S. M., Lee, R., de Wit, H., & Jacob, S. (2014). Plasma oxytocin concentrations following MDMA or intranasal oxytocin in humans. Psychoneuroendocrinology, 46, 23–31. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psyneuen.2014.04.006
- Moser, A., Ballard, S. M., Jensen, J., & Averett, P. (2023). The influence of cannabis on sexual functioning and satisfaction. Journal of Cannabis Research, 5(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/s42238-022-00169-2
- Palamar J.J., Griffin-Tomas M., Acosta P. A comparison of self-reported sexual effects of alcohol, marijuana, and ecstasy in a sample of young adult nightlife attendees. Psychol Sex. 2018;9:54–68. https://doi.org/10.1080/19419899.2018.1425220
- Smith, A., Ferris, J., Simpson, J., Shelley, J., Pitts, M., Richters, J. Cannabis Use and Sexual Health, The Journal of Sexual Medicine, Volume 7, Issue 2_part_1, February 2010, Pages 787–793, https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1743-6109.2009.01453.x
- Robert Gordon Wasson. (1980). The Wondrous Mushroom.
- Tjehenet: Egyptian Faience – Birmingham Egyptology. (n.d.). https://more.bham.ac.uk/birminghamegyptology/eton-myers-project/virtual-museum/objects-come-to-life/articles/tjehenet-egyptian-faience
- Wagner, A. C., Liebman, R. E., Mithoefer, A. T., Mithoefer, M. C., & Monson, C. M. (2021). Relational and Growth Outcomes Following Couples Therapy With MDMA for PTSD. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 12. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2021.702838
- Waldinger, R., & Waldinger, R. (2023, January 24). The Good Life: Lessons From the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happiness by Robert Waldinger, MD and Marc Schulz, PhD – MGH Psychiatry News. MGH Psychiatry News. https://mghpsychnews.org/the-good-life-by-robert-waldinger-mark-schulz
- Zhang X et al. Negative affect circuit subtypes and neural, behavioral, and affective responses to MDMA: A Randomized Clinical Trial. JAMA Netw Open. 2025;8(4):e257803.
